Confessions of a Blogger

Only a guilty mind have a confession to make

I'm not saying I'm guilty of anything, but every blogger definitely has their own secrets. So I thought I'd jump in, take you behind the scene and talk about my blogging confession, and I hope I'm not the only one who experiences these things.

1. Blogging is some sort of personal space for me where I can escape reality to express myself, rant on my life, and share my current obsessions. I just couldn't be bothered with my SEO because it makes me anxious to think people might find out about my blog. I could say that I still love blogging even if no one read my blog. In fact, only a few of my friends and family members knew the existence of this blog. Introvert problem.
2. I rarely leave a comment on a blog
   I enjoy blog walking, I love reading people's blogs, but I rarely leave comments. I am way too much of a socially anxious mess. It's awkward for me to leave any comment as I have no witty things to say so, I'll just awkwardly follow your blog and, thank you very much. But I've been trying to fix these habits these days.
3. I'm bad at commenting back or replying to comments
   It genuinely makes my day whenever I see a new comment, and I'm sure every blogger feels the same. I feel horrible when I don't reciprocate, but as I said earlier, I'm socially awkward and have been trying to fix these habits.
4. I often forget to take photos
   OOn any occasion, I usually get more excited to share those moments with my Instagram friends and tend to forget to take photos for my blog's content. I then regret not having any nice picture when it's due to publish a new post.
5. My current theme is my second purchased theme in my 12 years of blogging
   I started blogging when I was 13. I'm sure every veteran blogger remember one of all those time when we all played with the coding and followed tutorials out there to beautify our blog. When I was in college, I just adopted any free template available on the internet as I didn't consider investing in my blog yet. I purchased my first premium template in 2019 and used it for around two years. Until recently, I felt like my blog needed a new image, and I fell in love with this template the moment I laid my eyes on it.  
6. I have 300+ drafts in my blog and only  have 40 posts published
   Actually, all the 300 posts were from 12 years ago, so I reverted all of them back to drafts before any embarrassing moment resurfaced.
7. I don't know how to judge what is a good photo
   One of my struggles with blogging is definitely taking pictures for my posts. Taking photos with the right angle is one thing, editing is another. I find photography and editing really hard for me to learn, especially when the subject is non-human, I don't have proper props. Most of the time, the outcomes are not as I expected. I know it's not ideal for blog photos. Still, I've been using Instagram filters for a while now, and I personally think it's so convenient & easy to work with!
8. I got a few offers to collaborate but turned down all of them
   I know it's a decent move to work with a company/brand. I did think of making passive income through blogging once in a while, but for now, it is an ambiguous path for me. Being a content creator comes with great responsibility, and I am not ready for that. Am I getting ahead of myself?
9. I don't have a defined niche
   I keep coming across blogs that talk about the importance of finding a niche. I have many passions, and my interests keep changing depending on my mood. I still can't decide my blog niche and don't want to restrict my blog to only one topic.

And those are all my blogging confessions. Hopefully, I'm not alone.

My Blogging Journey

It's Day 20 of RMO, and my sisters and I are now running out of diverting movies/tv-shows to watch. I miss writing so much, and since I've been at home for a while, I guess I have more time for my blog.

Both my blog and I evolved a lot during the past decade, My old contents were cringe-worthy, but in a way, it is nice to see the growth. I started blogging at the age of 13 in 2009 just for fun. Just like people used Myspace and Facebook, I used my blog to rant on my life. My first 200 posts were utter rubbish, and the contents were so immature. Well, I was 13 back then...

But when I started to learn more and more about blogging, I began to want to make my blog prettier. I remember I started learning photoshop and trying to set up my own theme by using CSS and HTML codes with the help of tech bloggers and making my blog prettier. I have garnered more than 1000 followers after 5 years of blogging and made some virtual friends (and we still keep in touch with each other). It was great to meet new people with similar interests and establish connections with them to the point you consider them as friends, even though you've never met face to face. Oh, good old days.

My blog started off with the title "Hati Hawa", and I always put "notahatihawa" to end my posts. It was sort of a sense of closure. Cringe. I know.

W When I first entered foundation studies, I started struggling emotionally. I was probably the biggest overthinker in the world, which led me to become paranoid and insecure. I'm still an overthinker and have negative thoughts, but back then, it was a lot more severe. I turn to the blog. And I think my over-overthinking habits started me to write a lot of deep, depressed, and beautiful-written cringy posts. I turn to my blog as if confiding in a friend. While I can't say I have moved on from those past feelings completely, I'm still proud of who I am. Blogging has always been an online diary for me. It's almost therapeutic.

I quit blogging for a year to focus on my college stuff, and one day, I came across a blog, which made me instantly hooked. I read pieces after pieces of the content, and suddenly it hit me; I want to start over.

While most of my blogger friends' blog has gone void and left un-updated for years, I decided to start over. http://ain-soofiyah.blogspot.my is my first URL, and I never changed it for 10 years, I think, as changing it means losing my traffic. Change can be pretty scary at first, but it is also an opportunity for growth. I did a lot of research before I came to a decision to start investing in my blog. I purchased a new domain and installed pretty themes from Etsy to take my blog to the next level and start blogging more seriously. It's funny to see how I'm constantly changing my mind about everything. I still can't decide my blog niche and color scheme because that's how indecisive I am and like too many different things. But the reason I blog has always been the same. I've always wanted my blog to be the platform to voice out my struggle and passion and to connect with more like-minded people out there.

I started this blog because of me, and it's still is.