13 March 2019

Final Chapter as Chemical Engineering Undergraduate

8:52 PM 0
Final Chapter as Chemical Engineering Undergraduate

Rereading the design report that I wrote while working on the new final year report, this kind of thought comes to my mind, "Ah, I am finally a final year student. It is the final chapter as a Chemical Engineering Undergraduate student". Final semester comes around a lot of quicker than I expected. One second I am a first-year student stay in the hostel and go through the orientation weeks, walk every day from hostel to the class with thick textbook HAHA and the next second I am a final year student stay with my parents, taking public transport to class and now busy with final year projects. As I am excited to move on to the next phase of my life, I can't help of being scared and doubting myself if I am competent enough to be an engineer.

Final year Research Project and Design project is like the pinnacle of chemical engineering undergraduate studies where you apply all whatever you've learned for the past three years to engineer something and graded for it. So many drops out because of this one course. Imagine after three years of study and you suddenly drop out. Doesn't it feel like you've wasted your previous three years? Everyone in class is having a hard time dealing with these two projects and everyone is being emotionally unstable and extra sensitive. But yea lets embrace all the chaos that may come in our way.

09 March 2019

Internship Experience as Process Engineer

3:32 PM 2
Internship Experience as Process Engineer

I promised you in my last two posts to share you guys my internship experience and it was like last four months since I ended my internship period? If you followed my post, you'd know that it was not easy for me to secure one company, I got tonnes of rejections, but alhamdulillah, one day, I got a call from Carigali Hess offering me a 12-weeks internship programme with them.

On the whole, I had a great internship experience. I was a part of process safety team for the first two weeks and the next week, I was transferred into process engineering and document control team. I swear I had the best team during my internship. But I remembered during the introduction session, it wasn't a pleasant session, I was attacked by my team leader.

He asked me, "What is your expectation from this internship?" and I explained to him generally, to gain knowledge or experience or something. He replied "That's too general. What do you expect to learn in this department? You want to master in piping? Instrumental?" I kept quiet as I don't know what to reply. He added up, "So what are you going to present by the end of your internship? 3 months are too short for you to learn everything here. Even 2 years are not enough." He attacked me again with tonnes of questions. I don't remember what I replied at that time but I remember I felt miserable like, It is my first-day, dude. Let me breathe. Luckily there is my supervisor backed me up, "It's okay if there is any project we can hand it over to her. Let her learn how things work here in 2-3 weeks, then we can give her project." I relieved.

After two weeks, I transferred to process engineering team. My supervisor told me, " It is better for you to learn with process engineering team as you will learn more with them. And as to have a better understanding of process safety, you need to master the whole process first". That is how I transferred to another department (but of course, it is related to human resource's issue too). In my new team, I had one team leader also acting as my supervisor and five other teammates. Four of them are process engineers and one draughtsman.
My team with my lecturer. My team leader is not in the picture :(

Basically, as an intern, there weren't so many things to assign but every first week of the month, it was always a hectic week. I had to monitor monthly the performance of every unit and to report it to my team at the end of the week. I did a lot of mechanical calculation which I thought I'd never learned in my class but actually, it really is helping me in designing my project. I get to see real equipment guided drawing, PFD and P&ID diagram that if you are chemical engineering students, you know that these kind of drawings are confidential that some company doesn't even share to their interns. My tasks are all relevant to my course, so I'm satisfied with my assignments overall. And I had a very awesome team, regardless of how busy they are, they always guide me and answered every single doubt I had. 

My fellow interns. Fatin is not in the picture. Merajuk kot

I had an enjoyable internship because of them, my fellow interns. We are all from different departments, but we always had our lunch together (especially when there are free foods!). We barely knew each other but we acted, joked, argued and fought as if we've been knowing each other for three years. Anyway, it is such a blessing to get to know these people and I am always missing them.

We also joined lots of social events held by this company every weekend such as safety carnival and bowling events. I never missed out tazkirah session we had every Monday afternoon every Thursday for Lunch and Learn session. It was a good gathering to hear out sharing from the experienced one.

Fellow interns during safety carnival
I really really recommend Carigali Hess for an internship experience as it was really enriching and if you follow my stories on Instagram you'd know that I had a very enjoyable internship because I only record enjoyable things ya know. 
P/s: The allowance is more than what PETRONAS pays

22 October 2018

Futile Permutations

8:37 AM 0
Futile Permutations

Thing is,

The days she wakes up
With dread for the mirror
And nights crumble away
With never-ending tears.
Because she isn’t-
Because she can’t be-
Because she’ll never be-

And I think about her and
Can’t help wondering;
Not why she’s like that but
Why she feels that way.
Why does she feel shame?
Why so much pain?
Why does she crave to be
Someone she’ll never be?

I think about her anger
And I think about her rage
And I see that girl crying
And wonder why she cares
Wonder why she’s so hell-bent
On a permutation
Into someone else
Which the world will call ‘Beautiful’.

And so it’s our dismal fate.
As we watch the elite of our world
The ones who are ‘beautiful’
The ones who have it all
The ones who receive
All the unending, glorious attention
The ones who are on top
Because they’re just beautiful.

And my heart will not stop
Bleeding verses of anger;
And it will not stop crying
Words of indignant desolation
And it won’t stop wondering
What our world has come to;
And it won’t stop fuming
At how deep the depth of shallowness
Have swallowed who we were meant to be
And turned us into nothing but
Headless, brainless corpses of the ficklest
Vainest, most insubstantial piece of rags
Who see only what they see and who are
What the world needs them to be.

Look good, you get the fame
Look good, you be ‘game’
Look good, you get ‘Hot-damn’
Look good, they crave your name
Look good, they wish to claim
Look good, feel no shame
Look good, entice the tame
Look good- it’s all the same.

Look bad- oh what shame
Look bad- pitied ‘game’
Look bad- they mock your name
Look bad- and you’re to blame
Look bad- and you they maim
Look bad- never claimed.

And I wonder about that girl
And wonder why she cries.
But how can I blame her?
When I am no better, no different, no wiser;
Though I should know better;
Though we should all know better;
Than selling our souls to the game
To Be-
Be seen-


Written by| EmAngster00|

04 August 2018

Unanswered love

6:50 PM 0
Unanswered love

Words that I can't speak
Things that I always keep
Secret hiding in the ocean deep
Only you I wanted to seek

It started with just one hello
And my heart won't let you go
The angelic face I see in you
Can't get out of my head with a single blow

I heard a sound deep within me
Calling your name in a special way
My heart started to race on that day
Can't understand what it wanted to say

How can I tell it to you now?
Even your shadow I can't find somehow
I can't wait the day after tomorrow
To say to you these words: I love you

I want you to hear my solemnly vow
Came deep within my heart, so listen carefully now
This is the right time to let you know
Words like I love you are purely true

I want you to look into my eye
To let you know the truth and lies
Closely, it will tell you how much I officially miss
Someone like you was in my wishlist

In my dream there is you and me
Day after day it's still you that I see
If that sweet dreams will turn into reality
I want to let you know that my love will last till' eternity

Written by Shiela Ambrocio

17 July 2018

How I survived in PASUM

10:13 PM 0
How I survived in PASUM
So, my boss' daughter is entering PASUM this year and he asked me if I have any advice for his daughter. I replied, "Just, enjoy your life there" He then asked me, " How's life in PASUM? Is it tough?" and I answered, "Nope, degree life is harder. Just enjoy your PASUM life"

I've always been wanted to write this kind of survival tips but yeah, *kinda busy? It's been about 3 years since I left PASUM but I would love to say my PASUM life is the most cherished moments I had in my life. If you ask me if I could travel through time, where would I go? I'll definitely answer my PASUM life. Of course, for the first 2-3 weeks, I find it hard to adapt to pre-university life. If you follow my blog since I was in PASUM, you'll be noticed, through my previous posts, how stressed I was in adapting my life there. But eventually, you'll be okay. Surely.

The first week of PASUM, all students must go through orientation week called "Minggu Suai Kenal Pelajar". I don't know about the others, but I don't have any hard time during my orientation week as there were few peoples called "Fasilitator Pelajar" or FP as short to facilitate us for our registration, and these FPs treated us like an adult, so don't worry, there will be no issues with bully etc. You will also learn about our tradition's dances called xi shua shua and gummy bear dances and yes, I still remember their moves. Awh, I kinda miss these moments. Ah, and I remembered, during this week, these FPs always advise us, like almost every night, to success in PASUM, most importantly, you must complete your weekly tutorial. It was like brainwashing to me.

Moving on, how do I study during my PASUM. There were 3 courses offered in PASUM, which is, life science, physical science, and built environment. But my batch was the last batch to have built environment course. So, I took Physical Science course as I wanted to pursue my degree in engineering. Alhamdulillah, I had so many great friends by my side that always remind me to do tutorials and assignments every week. "Ain, jom siapkan tutorial sekarang (in class, when there was no lecturer). Nanti dekat bilik boleh tengok cerita korea 😂" These magical words kinda motivate me. Who doesn't? Hahah. 

hashtag my sayang

For mathematics subjects, our class was divided into few groups (mix boys and girls in a group) and we all have to do group discussion every week to discuss if there were any problems we couldn't solve. Yes, I love my group members. We helped each other a lot not only in Math subjects but also the others subject's tutorial. Just not to be a parasite and freeriding your group members. Physic was the killer subject for us. And the most killer subjects was Physic 4 taught by Prof Abu Bakar (if I am not mistaken hahah) and Puan Ungku. But the key to tackle this subject is always asked your lecturer if you have any doubts and I am glad to Puan Ungku as my Personal Advisor and she was like a mom to me. And she always be the one that I'd refer to if I have any clarification.

During study week, what I did just do past year questions (because UM is famous with their repeating questions lol) at least last two years paper for every subject and a day before the exam, re-do your tutorial.

Alhamdulillah, with such effortless effort and with Allah willing, Allah grants me 4 flat in both semesters and with these results I got offers to pursue my degree in Chemical Engineering at the University of Seafield and University of Nottingham in UK. *celebrates* But, unfortunately, due to financial problems plus during that time, MARA has stopped to give scholarships to students due to few conflicts. Political and financial conflicts, idk. So, I decided to continue my study here, in University Malaya. But it is okay because UM just ranked as the 87th top university in the world! *celebrates again*

Did I join any project when I was in PASUM? Yes, I did join several projects while I was in PASUM. I'd like to encourage those who are entering PASUM to join and learn as much as you can while you were here. Because through these projects, you will create more and more beautiful memories with your new friends and your significant other? *tiber hahah
Kinda miss these peoples. Hope we all can meet together again!
That's all from me. Hope you guys will enjoy your PASUM life as much as I do. If you have any questions about PASUM, feel free to ask in the comment section and I will answer as much as I can. Will share about my internship experience in the next post soon. Later!