A Letter to Myself in a Year's Time

Dear Ain,

It's a year or so since you've written this. I wonder where you'll be in a year's time. Looking back at year time, you'll probably see lots of changes and lots of things that are still the same. 

I hope you have found where you pictured yourself you would be. And, hopefully, it's everything you've imagined. Just don't lose track of what's important, what's worth making time for. I hope you remember when we were at the lowest point of our life, every struggle we faced to overcome those disadvantages of ourselves. You will be able to hark back and see exactly how far we've gone through and thought that she finally made it.

2019 has taught you a lot. 2019 has literally flown by blood, sweat, and tears, but there are many things to be thankful for. There were tears and heartbreak when all you want is to shallow them in yourself. Still, they were also good times when you are blessed with a strong support system, family, amazing friends, and supportive lecturers and the existence of the people you love and care for, on whom you shall shower them with endless love and support.  

If you're still striving to find your place, you will have ample time to do all thing that you love, so stop stressing so much. Enjoy it all. You miss the beauty when you're stressed. Keep going and never give up.  

I hope Ain of 2020 is living her life to the fullest. I hope Ain of 2020 has confronted her inner fears, smashed her insecurities, and let go of her inner doubts. I hope she's not feeling guilty. Of being herself. I hope Ain of 2020 knows that I love her so much. She's the most amazing person I've ever met. Just because she's Ain. She doesn't have to do anything to be worthy; she just is.  

Whatever happens, Ain, whatever you've done this year, whatever you haven't, whatever you missed, whatever you grateful for, whatever you hate, whatever you love, whatever you want to change, whatever you want to erase, regardless of anything - you're always worth it. 

Time needs to do its healing dance. I hope Ain of 2020 will eventually come to understand why these happened. I hope you have gathered up all your broken fragments and put them yourself back together. I hope you have found the place where you belong when you finally feel at home, and I hope it never falls to pieces again. I wish 2020 treats you kindly, and I hope it all works out in the end.

I hope the best of you and I truly do.

Ain of 2019